This is a sponsored post from 8th Continent and BlogHer.
It was a warm afternoon. Me and my daughter, who was 3 years old at the time, were parked outside of school waiting for The Middle Child to get out. Gas prices were high, so I refused to leave the car running with the air on. So, I turned the car off and rolled down the windows to let the (warm) breeze in. My precious little daughter was sitting in her car seat, waiting patiently for her brother.
A car pulled up and parked in front of us. A woman got out of the car, shut the door and hit the lock button from her keys.
*beep beep* went the car as she locked it.
Suddenly, without warning, my daughter shouted at the woman.
"DUMMY ASS!"
I heard it. But my ears couldn't believe what I had just heard.
The woman looked over at us. I turned my head away from her, looked at my daughter and asked her WHY DID YOU JUST CALL THAT WOMAN A DUMMYASS?
"Because, she was all honkin' her horn at us and that was rude!" She responded.
I was stunned. DID MY 3 YEAR OLD REALLY JUST SAY THAT? She did. OhmyGod.
"She wasn't honking at us. That was her car alarm!"
"No, she honked at us and you always yell 'dummy ass' at people who honk at you when you're driving!"
And that's when I realized my daughter had just done the perfect impression of me as a driver.
From that day on, I never yelled "dumbass" while driving again. Let me rephrase that, I never yelled "dumbass" while driving when my daughter was in the car with me. But it took AN ENTIRE YEAR to get my daughter to stop saying "the word that mommy says when she gets mad at dummyass drivers."
8th Continent knows that being a mom isn't easy and they want to salute motherhood for what it is: doing your best every day. Of course, no one is perfect and we all make mistakes while trying to do our best.
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My mommy moment is similar to yours...we were driving home one afternoon and this car tailgated me the entire way home. When I made the final turn, the guy blared his horn and I flipped him my middle finger. We went into my parents house and she was playing around. My dad came down the hall and said, "BEEP BEEP" when he tried to get around her. Out of the clear blue, she flipped her middle finger at him. OMG...my parents could not believe I had taught her that. It took months before they realized it was by accident....they figured it out when she overheard my mom say SH*T and walked around mimicking her!
ReplyDeletebleatham*at*gmail.com
Once I went to pick my son up from school and was in quite a hurry. I sat there and sat there until I realized, I was at the wrong school.
ReplyDeletegmissycat@yahoo.com
When my son was really little, the Easter bunny brought my son some M-n-Ms with nuts! My son said "I don't like nuts." I think the Easter bunny was thinking of what mommy liked instead of her baby! :-)
ReplyDeletekmassman gmail
My daughter found out I was the tooth fairy when she found my stash of her baby teeth I had hidden.
ReplyDeletes2s2 at comcast dot net
That is hilarious! I don't have kids yet, but I have definitely tried to pass off swear words as not swear words when nannying. Fudge? Shoot? Darn? Who was I kidding! scg00387 at yahoo dot com
ReplyDeleteI told my 8 year old daughters the truth about the tooth fairy. They were hinting that they knew who was really leaving them the money.....so I thought they were ready. Well they weren't ready yet! They started bawling and I had to backtrack my way out of it saying that I was just teasing them. It was not my shining moment as a mom!
ReplyDeletenuthouse(at)centurytel(dot)net
tweeted: https://twitter.com/KerryBishop/status/24299437886
ReplyDeletenuthouse(at)centurytel(dot)net
One time my 3 year old was snuggling in my bed with me, when I felt my "ummmm..... toy" turn on and start the mattress vibrating.... It was stashed between my box spring and my mattress and must have turned on by itself. My daughter said, "Mommy, I think I feel the cat purring." I was divided between laughing hysterically and being horrified!!!
ReplyDeleteLaura in Michigan
chinnchimneysmom@yahoo.com
We won't pretend to be very religious people. In fact, we only go to church on holidays, usually Christmas Eve. When we do, we dress up and head to the gorgeous church around the corner. All 5 of us pile into the pew and get ready to hear the always amazing mass. Last year we were sitting and listening, the church was quiet as everyone was listening. The church isn't that big. Maybe 100 people can fit comfortably. While the priest was serving mass he kept repeating "jesus christ" as I am sure is apart of every mass. Anyway, our 4 year old sat listening and when the priest said "jesus christ".... our son YELLED "HEY THATS WHAT WE SAY AT HOME, JESUS CHRIST!" As our faces turned many shades of red and just about the entire church turned around and looked at us.... we politely told our son that he was using those words in a different way than we do at home and that it's bad to say it like we do at home..........You can be assured that we NEVER muttered those words in our house again. Not even when we stub our toe or have to clean up cereal smashed into the carpet......
ReplyDeleteNot my brightest mommy moment.
Angelena
mcguire.angelena@gmail.com
A couple months ago, I told my daughter's dad that he didn't really need to buy her a bunch of new clothes for fall - including undies - cause she still had a bunch that fit her. Fast-forward to two weeks ago, when we were in Target and my daughter asked me if she could have new panties. Thinking she just wanted fancy Disney ones or something, I told her no. "But mama," she said, "look!" And she showed me her waist, which had a huge red line around it where her undies were cutting in to her skin because they were too small. I felt about 2 inches tall.
ReplyDeleteshylah-at-simplyshylah-dot-com
This is so funny! My daughter was about 2 years old and my mom was taking care of her while I was running errands. My mom had a lollipop on her dining room table and my daughter asked for it. My mom said "No, not right now" and my daughter sighed and said "Dammit." Whoops! My mom had to run out of the room so my daughter wouldn't see her laughing! I had to stop saying that ASAP! tuliptoe (at) gmail (dot) com
ReplyDeleteI can't even think of just ONE moment to share! The ones that pop into my head are where I hear my kids sound EXACTLY like me when I'm not at my best. For example, they're speaking to each other in an irritated manner and I realize that they've learned that from me.
ReplyDeleteOr the other day when my daughter was frustrated with me and raking her fingers through her hair, and I said, "STOP DOING THAT!" and she said, "But Mom, you do that all the time!"
Those moments happen more than I like to think about.
lisakaymahoney (at) yahoo (dot)com
I think every parent has had this happen at some point but I didn't use the built in strap on the changing table and my son rolled right off.
ReplyDeleteMy most recent? My THIRD child (as in I should know better) had been rolling and scooting awhile, yet I still left him on my bed while I ran to do something. Hearing that sicking THUD when he fell off onto the hardwood floor below....still makes me feel bad! tina(at)the-miles(dot)org
ReplyDeleteI often tell my kids to "remove your nose from your [brother's/sister's] butt crack, please," as family shorthand for "you're sticking your nose where it doesn't belong, please extricate yourself." I don't say it in public, but I didn't really think it was that bad, either.
ReplyDeleteUntil the time my son had his friends -- brothers -- over here playing, and he told one of them to "remove your nose from your brother's butt crack!" because he was trying to narc on his brother. Stopped those kids cold in their tracks, and suddenly realized maybe my choice of wording could've been better....
(wouldaATgmailDOTcom)
When my son was one year old. I gave him more medicine than I should have and for about a day and he just looked at me like he was in a daze. He came out of it as soon as I realized my error.
ReplyDeleteMCantu1019@aol.com
When my baby was probably 1-2 months old, she was lying on our bed with me as we lounged around one evening and watched TV (Daddy was in the chair). I picked up my cell phone and tried to take it with me as I changed positions, but it slipped out of my hand as I moved and dropped right on her forehead! She was screaming her head off and we were both crying, and I nearly teared up every time I saw the little mark until it went away. It was her first boo-boo. :( Email is iheartducttape[AT]gmail[DOT]com
ReplyDeleteThis happened a few years ago, but it's still funny to me. After fixing my son's and my husband's lunches, the lunch bags got swapped. My son came home from school declaring that from now on he wanted pastrami on rye every day for lunch because it was a "big boy sammitch" and my husband came home from work embarrassed as heck after opening his lunch bag and pulling out a dinosaur-shaped peanut butter and jelly sandwich and a smiley face cookie in front of all his colleagues. :)
ReplyDeletehttp://twitter.com/tnshadylady/status/24341426440
ReplyDeleteMy son said his first swear word at 2 1/2 after hearing me say it while trying to move furniture. I couldn't help but laugh at him so of course he kept saying it. Luckily it didn't stick and he didn't say it again after that day.
ReplyDeleteMine isn't so much a blunder as my son was just starting to talk. We were at the store, and he started pointing at the clock and shouting "Clock! Clock!"....except he left out the "L". Of course everyone looked at me as if he were saying the bad word. Having to explain to everyone that my son was actually saying "clock" was pretty embarrassing (and annoying). I anticipate many more parenting blunders to come, as my son is only 19 months :)
ReplyDeletesounravelme@gmail.com
My 4yr old twin pushed the wagon up to the back door, loaded their baby sister inside (who was a small toddler at the time) and took her for a walk down the block, all while I was... um... blogging. After too-many minutes went by, I noticed it was REALLY quiet, only to find the family room where I left them EMPTY. They were over at the neighbors' house! That was a walk of shame, to go and retrieve them! Especially since I wasn't for sure how long they had been gone. It was less than 10 minutes, but even 5 minutes probably seemed like FOREVER to that neighbor, talking to them and wondering where in the HELL their mother was. ;)
ReplyDeletelifeinatinytown@gmail.com
My adorable middle daughter fell down the stairs when she was under a year....TWICE....because her father and I both forgot to put up the gate. You'd have thought we would have learned the first time. :)
ReplyDeleteI'm not a parent, but once when my much younger sister was three, we went to the auto parts store with my dad. They had one of those candy machines where you put in a quarter and it gives you a handful of M&Ms. I bought her a handful and in the car on the way home she clutched them like they were gold. At home she finally ate them and then came over to show me her hands covered in chocolate and candy colors. She was wearing this cute little birthday outfit. I looked slyly at my dad and then mimicked wiping my hands down the front of my t-shirt that she should wipe her hands off like that. So she did - on MY shirt! I think my dad is still laughing about that.
ReplyDeletebecomingcheryl at gmail dot com
I remember telling my daughter that (during Christmas) the wrapped presents were actually empty until Santa put presents in them and she proceeded to interrogate me on how he was going to take the paper off and put it back on and remember whose present was which, I still don't know how I got out of that one
ReplyDeletetbarrettno1 at gmail dot com
This is about my mother's parenting blunder. When I was a teenager little mini-scooters were the rage.
ReplyDeleteI pleaded to get one, but, my mother refused saying they were dangerous.
So, in a perfect case of irony, while on a off-boat excursion from a cruise she took up an offer for a mini-scooter. As her luck would have it, she fell on her bottom. Mostly her pride was hurt.
A good example of do what I say, don't do what I do.
We had a good laugh, but, I never got the mini-scooter.
scoopster(nospam)at yahoo dot com
Well, I just clicked the video link above thinking my 7 year old son was out of earshot... only to have him yell from the other room, "Mom, why is that girl yelling kickface?". Doh! Glad he misheard it at least....
ReplyDeletemail4tanya(at)yahoo(dot)com
Not a mommy moment, but an aunt one: I dress my 3-year-old niece in a cute outfit for a party I'm taking her to. She's got a bit of a cold, so I try to give her a little Robitussin. I shouldn't have dressed her first, because she just opened her mouth and let it all fall out, all over the cute outfit and then she started crying. With a squinchy little face as if I didn't love her. Gah.
ReplyDeleteSuzy Q
sumarel@gmail.com
one morning after many sleepless nights in a row, i tossed a bag of marshmallow's in my kid's room when she woke up at 630 am on a sat. whoops!!
ReplyDeletehancoci_s at msn dot com
I have plenty of my own, but I'll tell one on my mom, because we still tease her about it. When I was in 3rd grade the assignment was to build a diarama- a very popular assignment in the late 1960's early 1970's. Using a shoe box I made a nice drawing of the Golden Gate bridge and put it on the back inside the shoebox and added some sand and plastic greenery to forefront. Before I took it to school, my mom suggested I glue the sand down. I didn't want to. I liked it all nice and loose and flowy, but she prevailed. (I know she was trying to help just get it there.) Did I mention this was a contest? I didn't win. The comments on my score card said it was really nice, but I shouldn't have glued the sand down. It made the beach look too much like a desert.
ReplyDelete40 years later and Mom still has to live with the guilt!
When I was a first time mom, (I have 4 now, so getting better with age), I sat my newborn son, who was in his car seat, on the table. I was in a rush and I made sure lights were out, cabinets were shut, and all the house was tidy. I rushed out, started the car and drove. I looked back in the rear view mirror to not see my son anywhere!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I left him on the table in his car seat! I turned around, darted in the door like a mad woman, and he was just looking around like everything was fine. After that, I never left my son again!
ReplyDeleteleahforlove(at)aol(dot)com
Actually it was my husband's blunder. He was working, fixing a stool with my then 2 year old. His clamp slipped, he hurt his hand and said, "Sonovabitch!" She just sat there, intently watching...
ReplyDeleteSo then another clamp was placed, and another...which also slipped, hurting his hand.
She looks up with the most innocent look on her face, questioning, "Sonovabeech, Daddy?"
Apparently that's what you're supposed to say when the clamp slips and you hurt yourself. ;D
chicka.nuts@gmail.com
I took one of my daughters out with no pants/diaper....oops. I got distracted when changing her and pulled up her pants. You guess it, in the middle of shopping we had an 'incident'!!! Ewwww.
ReplyDeletekclements2001 (at) hotmail (dot) com
My then toddler daughter made the mistake of falling asleep in the car just as we were pulling into our neighborhood. She is an unmovable force when asleep, so I decided to just let her be while I pulled weeds near the car, which sat with the windows open in the driveway. As I pulled and pulled those weeds, I moved further and further from the car. Somehow I managed to wind up outside of hearing range, so I completely didn't hear her wake up. When I did find her, HOOBOY, it was ugly. :-(
ReplyDeleteburghbaby@gmail.com
I think my worst parenting moment was when my daughter was maybe...6 months or so...we were cosleeping at the time, and I am not sure if she rolled out of bed or if I pushed her out somehow, but she fell face first onto hardwood floor.
ReplyDeleteI felt miserable, tried to move her to the crib immediately, and when that did't work I just moved my mattress to the floor.
Awesome.
Tweet: http://twitter.com/givekaciestuff/status/24520426839
ReplyDeleteI once forgot for the tooth fairy to come. I had to sneak outside and out $2 under a flower pot and tell my crying child that the tooth fairy didn't forget her, she just couldn't get in the house! hellohi352@hotmail.com
ReplyDeleteI loved your story! As cute as it is, it was a bad word though lol! But now it's time to think.. a story of my own? I remember leaving the little one in the bathroom when setting a bath then coming back and seeing bubbles everywhere, not just in the tub. What a night, let me tell ya! kytah00@yahoo.com
ReplyDeleteTWEET http://twitter.com/kytah00/status/24627200182 kytah00@yahoo.com
ReplyDeleteMy son, bless his heart, has taken to calling his brother an a$$hole when he makes him made. Probably caught that from his mother shouting it at drivers, but I totally blame it on his father. We send him to his room every time, but it is so dang cute. ohritz{@}yahoo{.}com
ReplyDeleteI told my four year old to keep the dog from getting outside with me when packing for a vacation. The problem was that the dog didn't want out to run frantically all over. My son kept him from going outside...only to let him poo all over the kitchen floor. Of course I got mad...then realized he was only doing what I told him to do.
ReplyDeletemattschmunk at gmail dot com
Same thing happened to me! Except the word was "shit", once day while playing she said "sit!" and I thought she really meant sit, and I said we're already sitting honey, and she said, "no, sit! cause my toys fell!" I thought O M G.
ReplyDeleteshevilkenevil1 at aol dot com
One day my son was trying to get my attention and I kept putting him off because I was in the middle of frying bacon. I presumed nothing was wrong because I hadn't heard anything from the room he was in. Well, after I was done cooking, I went to figure out what it was he wanted--only to discover he had a fish hook stuck in his heel! He never cried, nor did he tell me there was a problem. He just wanted me to look. We had to take him to the doctor to get the hook out. It never occurred to me something like that could've happened--because there was no reason (that I knew of) a fish hook would be in our living room. I found out later from my husband that they had won a pack the day before at the fishing pond. Somehow the bag got opened and my husband thought he had picked them all up (he was wrong, once again). Anyway, I learned my lesson. My son is my fourth child and I imagine I always responded to all of my kids immediately; but this time time, I put him off. I know better now.
ReplyDeletealeq13@gmail.com
We're a family of potty-mouths...my son was about 4 at the time and my husband and I were driving home from the store and my son was in the backseat. Someone cut us off in the parking lot and my husband had to lock up the brakes causing all of us to shoot forward with the sudden stop. From the backseat, my son yells "F*&^ YOU IN THE HEAD, MAKE YOU HAPPY???" I couldn't stop laughing just because of the way he put the whole phrase together...his own little creation. My son is 27 now and we still use that phrase as the mother of all obscenities in our house.
ReplyDeleteshel704 at aol dot com
I closed the car door on my little one's fingers... man, did I feel terrible!
ReplyDeleteMy daughter was 4. She'd just had another MRI, something we were used to by then. The routine was she couldn't eat beforehand, and they gave her a narcotic in her IV during the test. I learned that I had to get her out of the hospital when she was done, and hopefully she wouldn't wake up till we got home.
ReplyDeleteBecause when we got home...she was a different child - a child coming down from narcotics. The trick then was to give her some food to combat it. Well, this day she woke up in the car and demanded to be taken to McDonalds. I stopped and we went in. She was walking like she was drunk and carrying on. She normally had the best, sweetest disposition - sans the drugs.
I'm sure people were staring at me, wondering why I didn't control my child. Then I set her on the counter to pay (she couldn't stand up straight). And....due to the fluids they had pumped in her at the hospital in the IV, she peed on the counter at McDonalds!
I was mortified. Now I was sure people just thought I had an out of control bratty kid....not a child with a brain tumor.
OMG!
On my 12th birthday my mom had invited my two best friends over for dinner. She told me they were coming at 6 pm and I had time for a bath. But she had told them 5pm so she opened the bathroom door and let them it. Mortification for a 12-year-old.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the contest.
http://twitter.com/slehan/status/25060759610
ReplyDeleteI once packed an empty lunch box for DD to school. Boy I felt terribly guilty!
ReplyDeletetcarolinep at gmail dot com
I was taking a bath when a telemarketer called and my 6 year old handed me the phone. Done with the call I handed the phone back to her. 2 minutes later she told me the police was on the phone. I talked to the police to find out that it was 911 on the phone I explained what had happened and daughter must have pushed 911 when she took the phone. They didn't care and I was told an officer would be at my door shortly. I met him at the door in my bathrobe and he asertained that everything was well
ReplyDeletebepoia(at)hotmail(dot)com
My mother would always forget vital steps of a recipe, and ruin dinner. I'm sure there were other mistakes as well, but I don't remember them!
ReplyDeletespcase (at) gmail dot com
Last year, my son had early dismissal from school and I had forgotten all about it. The bus came by our house to let my son off and fortunately, the bus driver saw that my car or I wasn't there, so she didn't let him off & instead contacted the school, who contacted me on my cell. I felt so bad. My son was scared and I felt terrible.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much.
rickpeggysmith(at)aol(dot)com
I've done this one a million times. Emptied the dishwasher thinking the dishes were clean, they were not.
ReplyDeletehave done the dishwasher thing, the empty lunchbox but I think the most embarrassing thing I did was go to school to help out for the day and at lunch when I took off my sweater had an extra large bandage on my back- at least thats what the kids thought- I had put my sweater on the bathroom counter and the pantiliner stuck to the sweater- yes it was clean...I wondered where it went when I was getting ready..the kids in the class thought I had a big boo boo- thankgoodness they did not know what it was but surely someone could have said something
ReplyDeleteMy daughter was home sick from school staying alone for the first time. She kept calling and calling telling me she was freezing. I told her it was just a fever. Take some Tylenol and climb under the covers. I wasn't until night time when I realized we had a setback thermostat and it was like 55 degrees in the house all day.
ReplyDeletebatlorry@gmail.com
We had a bad word mishap too. My sister in law asked my son what he liked best about kindergarten and his reply... Not a damn thing.. Whoops..lol
ReplyDeletewhit1966@gmail.com
When my son was very young I said crap and of course he repeated it constantly! They always seem to repeat the words you don't want them to say!
ReplyDeleteMy son was in circle time when he reached up his pant leg and pulled out a sock that had static clinged to the inside of his pants.
ReplyDeleteMy little boy's first haircut - scareball because of moi
ReplyDeletetvollowitz at aol dot com
My faux pas was not telling my daughter what things really were. When she was about 4 she asked me what my feminine pads were. Not knowing what to say to a 4 year old, I told her they were "mommy's bandaids" About a month later we were shopping, it was the holidays and very busy in the store. She went over to the next aisle with her cousin. Next thing I know she is yelling"mommy's bandaids, mommy's bandaids" and running to me with a box of pads. I learned quick, if you tell them the truth, they forget about it and move on, if you make up cutesy explanations they don't forget and are apt to use it at the worst possible time,lol
ReplyDeleteI like the dickhead video. Not a mom story but a babysitting my niece story. We were having fun playing with dinosaurs and she was worked up. She was getting on and off the couch. I watched her each time. Then I turned around to get a book and I heard a thud. She had fallen off the couch on to the carpet she looked shocked and a little teary so I hugged her and she was fine w/in minutes. I felt so guilty and my heart was racing. Kids will fall and you can't protect them from every little thing..still it is stressful
ReplyDeleteI have two kids. After buckling Alicia into the car I pulled out of the driveway to head to the bank. I got about 1/4 mile from my house and realized I left Alex in the driveway in his infant car set. Fortunately, he was fine and fast asleep but I felt like a jerk!
ReplyDeleteOne time I had to take the dogs stool sample to the vet and drop it off to be checked for any problems (Typically puppy tests) I accidently switched the paper bag with the sample, with my daughters lunch. I got to the vet and realized it, rushed to her school and quietly slipped the poo poo sample out of her backpack and her lunch in it's place. Phew close call!!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the chance.
mogrill@comcast.net
I had forgotten that it was my sons half day at school and I wasn't home when his bus arrived. They had to take him back to school and wait for me to pick him up...I felt like an idiot!
ReplyDeleteI was moving my daughter from one exhibit to another at the zoo. Because she hopped out at each one, I didn't bother fastening the belts. We hit a bump, and she flew headfirst to the ground and wound up with a huge knot on her head.
ReplyDeleteJennifer, jennem22 at yahoo dot com
we are fluent in 3 languages, one being tongan..when my girls cuss they do it tongan because they know one will understand them
ReplyDeleteThis one is my ex's - we were in the spa (warm, not hot) with my daughter when she was about 4 months old. He was playing with her and her hat and put her hat on his head. Only problem was, he let go of her to do that and she went under! No harm, but boy did we move fast! He's never lived that one down!
ReplyDeletesksweeps (at) earthlink (dot) net
Well, I don't have kids, but I have a little sister. Once, when I was babysitting, I fed her a bowl of cool whip with peppermint extract and chocolate chips. She still talks about it like it was awesome; I'm pretty sure I got a little crap for putting her on a sugar high for the day. ;)
ReplyDeletekrtrumpet [at] aol [dot] com
Dropped her on her head. And her neck. It was bad.
ReplyDeleteAfter a fall, I told my daughter to quit crying, she couldn't be in that bad of shape. Turns out (2 days later) she had broken both bones in her lower arm! But hey, I saved the price of an ER visit! :) (No, there was no swelling and I had her looked at by 2 RNs and an EMT in the meantime. All were sure it was a sprain.)
ReplyDeleteI remember the time my mother took us to feed the horses. My oldest sister made a shocking cry, mom thought the horse had bitten her. Mom scared the horse who then really did bite her. She was screaming over the slobber. I am queenesperfect at yahoo.com
ReplyDeletehttp://twitter.com/sodahoney/status/25374961077
ReplyDeletebatlorry@gmail.com
I was taking my son to ball practice and loaded the trunk with folding chairs, etc. I placed his glove on the top of the car, got distracted and drove off. We got to practice sans glove. The coach was not amused.
ReplyDeleteOh, which one do I choose.
ReplyDeleteWe were babysitting my niece (6 mos old) and we were going to church…and we got everything loaded, and were backing out of the driveway when my 9 year old said “mom…where’s the baby”…..she was snoozing in her car seat…ON THE COUCH!!!!
YIKES!
My daughter lost her tooth at school and was so excited to see what the tooth fairy would bring. Unfortunately, the tooth fairy brought... nothing. I forgot and fell asleep. oops.
ReplyDeleteRead the rules and it says I can tweet this giveaway too so I tweeted for you. Original comment above! I am so excited!
ReplyDeletegmissycat@yahoo.com
http://twitter.com/gmissycat/status/25588571312
My daughter had a long-term boyfriend named Jack. Long after they broke up, I was still calling the new guy Jack, although usually not to his face. Not cool.
ReplyDeleteLike a thousand times before, I made sure my child was buckled up in the car. But this time, I FORGOT to buckle up. Before the car's reminder ding could even start, my kid shouted out "BUCKLE UP!"
ReplyDeleteI breast fed my first son for only 3 months - it didn't go too well, so I started him on the bottle. He was almost 10 or 11 months old when I realized that the nipples for the bottles were sized by age....we never changed from the 3 month nipple, so the hole was really really small and the poor thing had to suck so gosh darn hard to get the milk and couldn't get it fast enough! I still feel like such an idiot for that one!
ReplyDeleteI'm not a parent myself, but I remember when I was a kid when my mother used pepper instead of cinnamon on cinnamon toast. Now, that's completely inedible.
ReplyDeletemystery250(at)comcast(dot)net
the time i took my daughter to dance class on the wrong day
ReplyDeleteMy mom had had my sisters hair permed, and they insisted mine be permed as well. The lady put the solution on, and my head was on fire, I tried to stick my head in her aquarium, she pulled me to the sink, but I started Jr. High having a third less hair. In keeping with my mothers favorite saying, that you must suffer to be beautiful, or in the attempt to be beautiful.
ReplyDeleteI have a problem with not paying attention to the weather reports. Seeing as the weather here in Michigan changes frequently, I look like a bad mom when I send my daughter to school in shorts and a short sleeve shirt when it ends up being a chilly 55 degree day.
ReplyDeletemmburdette22@yahoo.com
I was babysitting my 2 year old grandson and was in the laundry room when he shut the door on me and turned the door lock, which is on the outside of the door. So there I was locked in the laundry room with a toddler alone in the house. I tried to get him to turn the lock the other way, but that didn't happen. So I went through the garage and around to the patio door and of course that was locked too. All the time my grandson is grinning at me through the glass door, thinking we were playing a game. All the doors and windows were locked so I finally went back to the garage and got a screwdriver and managed to jimmy the lock open.
ReplyDeleteIt was very nerve racking for me, but my grandson had a blast.
eswright18 at gmail.com
I got caught trying to get a tooth from under a pillow!
ReplyDeleteI constantly mix up my sons' names. When I was a kid, my mother used to mix me up with my brother, which I thought I would never in a million years do.
ReplyDeletemami2jcn at gmail dot com
Hot irons plus napping toddlers should not mix, no matter how asleep that toddler was when you ran to the kitchen. Sigh.
ReplyDeleteKathleen
kathleenpoling (@) yahoo (dot) com
My mom fuax paux is that I often times let me son eat in his car seat to save time, i will have him back a full lunch in small portions and get that out of the way while running errands. This leads to a big mess in the back seat but for me its worth it. On day I hear a gag noise and a "mama ewww" form the back before barf ensues and it turns out i left a sippy cup back there with spoiled curtles milk. I don't leave cups in the car anymore :(
ReplyDeletejennifer.lleras@gmail.com
i was laying in bed with my son watching a movie and i ended up falling asleep and when i did i went to rollover and i knocked him out of the bed. i felt so bad he hit his head on my dresser and he needed stitches. whitecarrie69@yahoo.com
ReplyDeleteWe're not supposed to eat at the table but I enjoy reading the newspaper at breakfast so now my son can't eat without his favorite book and whenever I bring it up he reminds me that I read at the table too.
ReplyDeletermartinclarke at gmail dot com
I washed at least three love letters my daughter has received from her boyfriend. For which I am now labeled the worst mom in the world...how about taking them out of your pocket, dear one?
ReplyDeletetrinitygsd at yahoo dot com
When my kids were young, I told them that I believed in Santa Clause and that his spirit is real. When the kids were 10 and 12 years old, they asked me again if I still believed in Santa Clause, I said "Yes, I still do!" They both laughted at me. I replied "I believe in Santa Claus because I am him". They stopped laughing real quick and hugged me!
ReplyDeleteI was making "Santa" tags for presents late Christmas Eve on my computer. I forgot to erase what I was doing and my son found my work the next day. Luckily he decided Santa was using my computer.
ReplyDeletechipdip2010(at)hotmail(dot)com
This morning I went into my daughter's room and stepped in a plate of last night's dinner. Why was it in her room? Why was it on the floor? Was was there still rice on the plate?
ReplyDeletePicture my head spinning while I breathed fire and you can imagine my reaction. Not a great way to start the day.
katfam95 at aim dot com
I would hide little love notes in their pockets and lunches. One day some friends found them first, and teased them mercilessly. I had to promise not to do it again! honeypie411 at yahoo dot com
ReplyDeleteWhen my son was a baby I slipped while holding him and he fell under water for a second in the pool. I've never forgiven myself for that
ReplyDeleteMy 6 year old overheard us talking about some family members who had done something we didn't approve of. When I realized my daughter had heard, I made the mistake of saying, "Please don't say anything to them." Of course, she couldn't WAIT to tell them what I had said!
ReplyDeleteHobartsMama {AT} AOL.COM
I locked my son in the car when he was about 18 months old and had no extra keys and spent 1/2 hour teaching him through the window trying to explain to him which button to push to open the door of the car, which he did finally figure out. I hugged him so hard when I opened that door and he looked at me like, "Huh? What's wrong?" He thought it was a fun game.
ReplyDeleteTweeted
ReplyDeletehttp://twitter.com/jillyrh/status/25865583937
Thanks so much
I was backing out of the driveway and the snow plows had made such a large pile that I couldn't see the road. I thought under my breathe I said "I can see sh*t." In the backseat I hear my 2 year old say "sh***********t" It dragged on for 10 seconds.
ReplyDeletewell for My son's birthday we decided to hold a nice party in the back yard having over the neighborhood kids. The only thing wrong with that was that was the year I got the bright idea to plant a nice HUGE garden with like 15 different things planted in it. Well I guess I dont need to say more!
ReplyDeleteWe were so overwhelmed by our lack of progress in the area of teaching our then, almost four year old, how to lose the diapers and start going on the potty, that we took to bribing him with Thomas the Tank Engine trains, each time he succeeded.
ReplyDeleteIt was extremely expensive and gave the words potty training a whole new meaning.
When my daughter was four she went sledding with her dad one late afternoon. They ran over something in the snow and came home because she was crying. We thought she was just over tired, so we gave her some tylenol and put her to bed. When she was still crying the next morning we took her to the doctor and found out she had a broken leg. We felt so guilty we didn't get her seen right away!
ReplyDeleteajolly1456 at gmail dot com
So far the worst mistake was when I left my daughter on our bed for a split second and she rolled right onto the floor
ReplyDeleteEarly one the morning my teenage daughter informed me that she would be needing some tampons from the store.
ReplyDeleteWhen my husband came home for lunch I asked him if he would mind picking some up on his way home to save me a trip and he agreed.
Little did I know that while I was out side he knocked on her bedroom door and when she answered he asked her if what brand and type of tampon he was suppose to buy or did she use maxi pads.
Needless to say, she was mortified. And by the time I came back from the garage she was furious with me.
jweezie43[at]gmail[dot]com
My worst fail was having a snowball fight with my family when my wife and daughter accidentally slipped and fell onto the ice. My daughter was crying hysterically, my wife yelling at me for being childish and insisting on going outside in the cold to play a silly game.
ReplyDeleteFrom then on the only winter activities we participate in are sledding and snowboarding.
pauleyd68 (at) yahoo (dot) com
I sent bologna and cheese sandwiches with my kids on a field trip. Little did I know, that the school wasn't taking coolers like usual. They both got major food poisoning. Even though they are teens now, they like to tease me about when I poisoned them. :)
ReplyDeletehafner611{AT}gmail{DOT}com
My youngest was so excited to go on his first roller-coaster, we were at Disney's California Adventure, we waited in line for 30 minutes, finally we got in our seats and he and I were lucky enough to get the first car--everything was going great--until they put the restraining bar down over his head--he freaked out and began to scream and cry--of course we were the first car --so we had to wait for them to go down the line and put down all the bars---I was sure they were going to ask us to leave. My attempts at calming him only made him cry louder--of course he stopped the minute the ride started --and as soon as it was over --still covered in tears he insisted "I want to go again!"
ReplyDeletekakihararocks@gmail.com
honestly i have too many. i was returning a gift at xmas time and the kid said to me "oh yeah...i told you there was no santa...theres the reciept...ha proof!
ReplyDeleteI was raised in a strict no swearing household. So I was quite surprised when my mom told me about her embarrassing experience. My paternal grandfather was a minister and we were having dinner with him one day. I kept saying something he couldn't understand (fortunately). I had picked up the word SH*T from my dad but I was very small and couldn't say it very well. That cured my dad and I never remember hearing him say that word again.
ReplyDeleteSorry, my email address is in my profile and I forgot to add it to my comment.
ReplyDeletewillitara [at] gmail [dot] com
In the car, I always tell my kids that I have eyes in the back of my head because they seem to get into mischief quite a bit. One day in the drive thru at the bank, my son unhooked his seat belt and started rubbing his hand all over the back of my head. I started to tell him to put the seat belt back on when he tells me that he's looking for the eyes in the back of my head. The teller couldn't stop laughing at me!
ReplyDeletepauline15_01 at hotmail dot com
I didn't take my almost 2 yr. old to the dr. after she broke her arm until the next day. My oldest daughter was caring her sister around, even though she was told not to, and dropped her. The baby cried for just a little while but seemed just fine. The next day she was trying to climb into a chair and cried when she put weight on her wrist. I take her to the dr. and sure enough, it's broke. I couldn't believe that I waited. Such a bad Mommy.
ReplyDeletecrystalfaulkner2000 at yahoo dot com
I have 3 yr old quadruplets & 2 of them are identical. I have introduced my identical boys wrong when looking at them from behind! Fabulous mommy moment! ;)
ReplyDeletecharityd AT centurytel DOT net
My fiance has a long goatee and I recently told him it looked like "pubic hair" in front of his daughter- not realizing she would probably repeat what I said. Oops!
ReplyDeleteyes, it really is tough to censor one's words when one is with one's kids! It's amazing how much they pick up! And when they choose to say those words- they do find the most embarrassing times!! But I ususally just explain to people that it's awful the things these kids learn at school from their classmates, LOL!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the giveaway!
email in blogger profile.
js22 [at] yahoo [dot] com
I trimmed my son's hair with the clipper and cut off his bangs by mistake!
ReplyDeletespencer1953 at gmail dot com-carol.
Patience isn't one of my virtues, so one day, I was sitting at a light with my son in his booster seat in the back. The light turned green, I was in a hurry, but the guy ahead of me didn't move. I said, "The light is green - GO!!!!" and never gave it another thought until 2 days later when my father was driving us somewhere and we were stopped at a light. The light turned green and my son said, "Gggee Lie - GO!" In other words, "Green light - Go!" I almost died because I knew why he was saying that, but everybody else thought it was hysterical, thinking it was from the "what do you do when the light turns green" song at school.
ReplyDeleteEmail address is in blogger profile
I used a mr. clean magic eraser on my son's cheek to get off some sharpie marker,...oops! he was a little red for a few days.
ReplyDeletethanks for sponsoring this.
2kidsblogger(at)gmail(dot)com
I was shopping one day with my 3 year old son when I saw a guy I had to do business with at work who was known for his sexual advances on women. I passed him trying to be polite, said "Hi, how are you?" and of course he started and I finally got away from him and walked off calling him a f*cking pervert. Two aisles later we passed him again and when my son seen him he said, Dare de f*cking pervret mama."
ReplyDeleteI never got harassed again.
When my son was 9 months old (he's now 34, so he survived me!) I locked him in the car. It was the 70's, so the policeman who arrived opened the door with a coat hanger. Nowadays I would need a locksmith!
ReplyDeleteMy daughter was in the grocery store with me and a lady asked her did she know where the milk was? LOL My daughter said right here and grabbed my boob.
ReplyDeleteWe were expecting company and told the kids we have to really clean up well. When the company arrived they promptly told them that they cleaned up the house just for them. Ughhh.
ReplyDeleteardy22 at earthlink dot net
Driving to Ohio from Florida to visit family for Christmas vacation, we took all the presents with us. My son really wanted a PlayStation and had no idea he was getting one. On the way up, during the long drive, I was thinking about my grandma's neighbor who is great, and has great, but rough kids. I told my son, out of the blue, 'Be careful letting $*$*$ and $*$*$ play with your Playstation because they're pretty rough on toys.' Instant glee and a loud, 'YES!' alerted me to my big uh-oh. We still laugh about today and that was many years ago.
ReplyDeletemsurosey@yahoo.com
I have always tried not to be too terribly judgmental but some things are nasty- and I know my kids caught the snark from me when like someone is in a restroom and doesn't wash their hands they have always said things *LOUDLY* like ewww nasty lady spreading her germs
ReplyDeleteI have done the classic say a "naughty" word in front of my nephew and of course he latched on to it immediately!
ReplyDeletenesta 67 {at} live dot com
Locked her in the car by accident.
ReplyDeleteOne time when my kids had an early release at school I forgot...if fact I never remembered until the school called me lol but it was not funny, my kids were mad!
ReplyDeletejustine417@comcast.net
I was driving this weekend with my nephew and I am normally not around kids all the time, so I when I was trying to park a large truck, I said where am I supposed to park with big f'ing SOB and he turns to me and says hey lady, how about we watch the language!
ReplyDeletetrippyjanet at hotmail dot com
I got my kids ready for school one day and we waited and waited for a bus that never came. I loaded them into the car and when we got to the school we realized it was a teachers professional day.... no school. My kids were pretty mad at me for waking them up when they could have slept in!
ReplyDeleteWhen my youngest was just about 3 months old she had awoke in the night and I was so exhausted I layed her on my chest to comfort her but then I fell asleep, while asleep I had a dream and rolled over and she fell off the bed I jumped up screaming to my husband and that woke my daughter up. Needless to say she was fine and I still feel horrible about that.
ReplyDelete